Want an old reality-check movie: "Mr. Deeds Goes to Town". They try to put Gary Cooper away as insane for wanting to give away unexpected inherited millions to poor farmers. Compare with the reality of the US seeking extradition from Spain of James Chambers for the "terrorism" of contributing too much of his billions to Palestinian causes. Hollywood ain't life. Mr.Deeds wins in the end. Not so the Palestinian people.
More important than ever that the search for justice continues! The work that the Hind Rajab Foundation is doing to track down and bring Israeli criminals to justice is one that is vital in the effort to hold Israel accountable. Let us hope they will also turn their sights on the criminal leaders of the countries of the west who are co-perpetrators of these crimes.
"He can’t just SAY “You make me wanna be a better man.” He needs to actually BECOME a better man."
Just one line from several here to illustrate that this is a fabulous piece, perhaps your best (thus far, though hard to top I would think). This entire piece is a keeper for me.
Oops, just noticed this was written by Tim Foley, my hat's off to you.
Of course. And she should do the same for him, getting past some of the damage done by whatever stage of feminism we've gotten to. It does come easier for women, but it is a partnership. Both parties have to work at it.
Exactly! Capitalism is the disease that destroys many relationships. The acquisition of material wealth is seen as more important than building relationships and things that "money can't buy."
Are you confusing capitalism with consumerism? They were allies, but not the same. The majority of Americans now are struggling to afford essentials. Capitalism has trained Americans to believe this is a character flaw, rather than the system working as intended. Since the ‘hand of the market’ is actually invisible, and most people know very well that they labor like donkeys, it’s easy to manipulate their fear and rage; men, you didn’t fail! It’s the women and brown folk!
Tons of money and the biggest brains are employed in this the US in social management aka ‘cognitive warfare.’ The goal is to prevent the plebes from realizing we have common cause. Divisive voices are elevated, nuanced voices suppressed. We are fed a daily diet of rage bait, all encouraging us to hate our neighbors and spouses, foreigners, and strangers. So long as the collective rage at outrageous injustice can be spent on fellow victims, we won’t look up or meaningfully revolt.
I suppose if you're into argument, but that, too, kind of makes the point. Men didn't create the system they were born into. They're victims as much as women are, and there are plenty of viscous women out there.
This may seem obvious, but our culture makes women crazy, too. I've known more than one sweet man who, for whatever reason, decides to put up with an insufferable bitch.
Face-palm inducing, but not really baffling. A significant percentage of men have a knee-jerk reaction when they asked to look inward to examine their own behaviour in relation to women. They perceive it as an attack on their masculinity by feminists trying to destroy the world (i.e. the patriarchy) that owes them… something. They become so defensive that they completely miss the whole point of the essay.
Tearing up here, Caitlin - thanks for writing this. My hubs & I will have been married for 37 years next month. We’ve *both* done, and continue to do, the work that has helped us last (and thrive) as a couple. Our mutual mantra during the inevitable tough times: “We’ll figure it out. We always do.” ❤️
Want an old reality-check movie: "Mr. Deeds Goes to Town". They try to put Gary Cooper away as insane for wanting to give away unexpected inherited millions to poor farmers. Compare with the reality of the US seeking extradition from Spain of James Chambers for the "terrorism" of contributing too much of his billions to Palestinian causes. Hollywood ain't life. Mr.Deeds wins in the end. Not so the Palestinian people.
Thanks to gypsy33 for the aljazeera link
https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2026/7/17/us-seeks-extradition-of-wealthy-pro-palestine-donor-from-spain
More important than ever that the search for justice continues! The work that the Hind Rajab Foundation is doing to track down and bring Israeli criminals to justice is one that is vital in the effort to hold Israel accountable. Let us hope they will also turn their sights on the criminal leaders of the countries of the west who are co-perpetrators of these crimes.
Find out what they’re doing here:
https://www.hindrajabfoundation.org
The least we can do is donate to help them:
Support the Hind Rajab Foundation
https://donate.stripe.com/cN228hbY5g7jaM84gg
gypsy33, thanks for the link from me too.
After 45 years of marriage, this is one of the best things I've ever read.
"He can’t just SAY “You make me wanna be a better man.” He needs to actually BECOME a better man."
Just one line from several here to illustrate that this is a fabulous piece, perhaps your best (thus far, though hard to top I would think). This entire piece is a keeper for me.
Oops, just noticed this was written by Tim Foley, my hat's off to you.
Caitlyn writes the pieces.
Tim Foley READS them.
Under second pic with Helen Hunt and Jack NIcholson says, "Written by Tim Foley."
Of course. And she should do the same for him, getting past some of the damage done by whatever stage of feminism we've gotten to. It does come easier for women, but it is a partnership. Both parties have to work at it.
For the life of me I can't identify damage done to women by feminism. Perhaps I lack imagination or comprehensive historical knowledge.
The perfect example right here. I was referring to the damage done to men. They've been damaged, I promise.
It wasn’t feminism that damaged men. It was capitalism.
Exactly! Capitalism is the disease that destroys many relationships. The acquisition of material wealth is seen as more important than building relationships and things that "money can't buy."
Are you confusing capitalism with consumerism? They were allies, but not the same. The majority of Americans now are struggling to afford essentials. Capitalism has trained Americans to believe this is a character flaw, rather than the system working as intended. Since the ‘hand of the market’ is actually invisible, and most people know very well that they labor like donkeys, it’s easy to manipulate their fear and rage; men, you didn’t fail! It’s the women and brown folk!
Tons of money and the biggest brains are employed in this the US in social management aka ‘cognitive warfare.’ The goal is to prevent the plebes from realizing we have common cause. Divisive voices are elevated, nuanced voices suppressed. We are fed a daily diet of rage bait, all encouraging us to hate our neighbors and spouses, foreigners, and strangers. So long as the collective rage at outrageous injustice can be spent on fellow victims, we won’t look up or meaningfully revolt.
Are you saying feminism has damaged men?
Yes. Without a doubt.
One could argue well deserved : )
I suppose if you're into argument, but that, too, kind of makes the point. Men didn't create the system they were born into. They're victims as much as women are, and there are plenty of viscous women out there.
...Nah, can't think of anything you could blame specifically on "feminism".
Economic woes tied to capitalism =/= feminism.
Social changes that allowed women to own houses and vote =/= bad for men.
People speaking up about toxic behaviors that boy children are forced to learn or be ostracized by their peers =/= bad for men.
Could you enlighten us perhaps?
Feminism. Oh, dear me. That radical notion that women have rights.
"damage done by whatever stage of feminism we've gotten to."??
Your statement is true of course except for that backhanded slight out of right field! That smacks of ideology, not academic research.
Well put. If you tried half the shit men do in romantic movies in real life, you'd get locked up.
Cats have it so much better.
Another great post. Life takes hard work and vigilance. And I might add study and questioning the status quo .
I have been married for 43yrs. Lots of bumps and arguments but I met a man who delighted in me as a person.
Thanks for confirming why I'm long term and permanently single. I never met anyone even approaching that.
They are few and far between, that's for sure!
Same here
I do think there’s some luck involved
This may seem obvious, but our culture makes women crazy, too. I've known more than one sweet man who, for whatever reason, decides to put up with an insufferable bitch.
It’s not CULTURE, it’s INDIVIDUALS.
First time I see an itemization of what a man needs to do AFTER he "wins" the girl. What a woman owes the man for choosing her is endless.
Which is why women need to do the choosing, Claire.
I had many suitors as a young woman. And I chose the one who was trustworthy, had a good-paying job with killer benefits, and can fix ANYthing 😉
Thank You Tim
& Caitlin
The amount of guys missing the point of the article by complaining it doesn't talk about what *she* needs to do is baffling.
Face-palm inducing, but not really baffling. A significant percentage of men have a knee-jerk reaction when they asked to look inward to examine their own behaviour in relation to women. They perceive it as an attack on their masculinity by feminists trying to destroy the world (i.e. the patriarchy) that owes them… something. They become so defensive that they completely miss the whole point of the essay.
Well said, Tim. Finding one’s partner is not the destination. It’s just the start of an amazing journey.
Tearing up here, Caitlin - thanks for writing this. My hubs & I will have been married for 37 years next month. We’ve *both* done, and continue to do, the work that has helped us last (and thrive) as a couple. Our mutual mantra during the inevitable tough times: “We’ll figure it out. We always do.” ❤️
And Tim! I’d missed that you were the writer this time (no coffee yet 🙃). Bravo.
If only...
The politics of broken men.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rduFfn_ryyg&t=24s
Yep Tom. More testosterone, the most toxic substance on the planet!
Thank You Caitlin